I saw a segment on the Today Show about an appropriate age to get girls' ears pierced. I was shocked to see the choices provided. Infant, 6 or 8. I think all these are too young. I have always told my daughter who is 6 that she could get her ears pierced when she is 16. I think 6 and 8 are way too young and I'm shocked there were no options for 13 or 16 in this poll. I don't think a young child of 6 is responsibile enough to handle piercing which needs to be cleaned and rotated daily. At 6, girls are still playing dress up. Give them clip on earings that they can enjoy wearing with no threat of infections and feel grown up without being grown up.
Earings are a sophisticated jewelry. I think girls should be in their teenage years for this but at least in a double digit number when they are old enough to be more responsible and more mature. Does a six year old really need to wear earings to feel pretty? What does this say about creating body image issues and self esteem issues? Am I going too far? I don't think so.
Why is society in a rush to make girls grow up faster. Let ear piercing being a right of passage and something to look forward to at a later age. It may seem trivial to make a stink about ear piercing but add up the "things" that are becoming more acceptable in our society and it quickly becomes pushing girls to start trying everything earlier in life and slowly our society changes what we find acceptable.
For instance the Abercrombie and Fitch padded bikini top, as I spoke of in an earlier blog entry. Put that out there and most parents are horrified but some parents defend it and will buy it. Wait a few years and the shock value will fade and it won't seem as bad. In fact look at showing a bra in public. Years ago on Seinfeld, it was a joke when Elaine gave her friend, who often went braless, a bra to wear so she wore it with no shirt on with an open blazer. It was funny because it was unrealistic that anyone would actually walk down the street wearing a bra with no shirt. Then Maddonna came around sporting see through tops and pointed bras. She was provocative and parents were outraged. Now it's totally acceptable to show bra.
A week after I saw this poll on the Today Show, my daughter came home and told me her BFF just got her ears pierced and asked if she could get her ears pierced. This was a tough conversation because I will not allow her to get her ears pierced at 6 but when her BFF got her ears pierced, it's hard to seem fair and it's a hard fight. I just thought to myself, are you kidding me? Why? Why? I told her I got my ears pierced at 16, her cousin got her ears pierced at 16 and she will get her ears pierced at 16. But this also gives me insight into the tough road ahead of trying to keep my daughter young and innocent when friends at school are allowed to do things at a young age that I feel is inappropriate.
What age do you think is appropriate? Infant, 6, 8, 10, 13 or 16? When did you have your ears pierced? Please comment below or email stephandjanblog@gmail.com.
Jan
Dinner plan: Tonight is easy. Left over ham with crushed pineapple, mashed sweet potatoes with butter and cinnamin, and corn.
Steph,
ReplyDeleteI was searching for a GF's blog and came across yours. Started reading and came across your post whether or not to let your 6 yr old have her ears pierced now. Hope you don't mind me leaving a comment, but I had a similar experience wondering whether or not to dd's ears at 2 years old or not.
First, I don't think your're crazy wanting your dd's ears pierced. Admittedly, I know a lot of people have strong feelings when to pierce a child's ear. "Let them decide" is being replaced by parental decision when mommy intuition knows, "earlier is better" from either personal or friend's experiences of unpleasant childhood ear piercing. I think it just depends on your own personal choice whether or not you wish your baby or little girl to have pierced ears. Some feel perceived gender of their child is important while others find it a cultural tradition where all infant girls have pierced ears.
Second, I went back and forth too whether or not to pierce our dd's ears as toddler. I asked our ped and she gave me some suggestions for moms having their dd's ears pierced.She had her dd's done at Piercing Pagoda and recommended them due to their professional training and experience with infant ear piercing. She said if they cry, it is because of being restrained or the noise of the piercing instrument near the ears, not any pain.Some say don't have a toddler's ears pierced, but my ped encouraged me to go ahead when mommy could care for them properly.
Third, my mom pierced my ears when I was 2 days old as and I've loved it....I think earrings on little girls are adorable!However, with Sandi, I just procrastinated. Many moms including myself like the look of earrings on babies and little girls for no specific reason, but like
how light plays off a simple gold ball on a bald baby girl or small gold hoop poking through the hair of a toddler.
I don't think having their ears pierced sexualizes them in any way. Cerebrally, as mothers of girls of all ages, we know it celebrates their femaleness and femininity.
After all, they are little girls, right? You dd is already got the bug from her friend with earrings and I'll bet she looks soO cute.
Lastly, since you are thinking about it, your mommy intuition is really telling you earlier is better to pierce your dd's ears. Listen to your heart and intuition. I'd say go ahead and have let her have it done soon.
Please write me an e-mail if you would like our ped's suggestions for moms having their dd's ears pierced.
Amy
amyswor@hotmail.com